English Mustache
The English mustache is what happens when a Handlebar goes to Oxford and gets a degree in sophistication. It's a narrow mustache that begins at the middle of the upper lip, with whiskers pulled to the side and slightly curled, creating long, elegant points that extend well beyond the face. Think of it as the Rolls-Royce of mustaches—refined, distinguished, and requiring regular maintenance by skilled professionals.
16-20 weeks
for proper length and styling potential
Requires dedication, quality wax, and the patience of a saint
$20-$40
Premium wax is non-negotiable
3,200
Monthly searches • stable
Best For:
Gentlemen who appreciate the finer things and have mastered the art of drinking tea without disturbing their whiskers
Warning:
May cause spontaneous monocle purchases and an inexplicable urge to say 'cheerio'
Measurements
Width
4-6 inches
Total span from tip to tip when properly extended
Thickness
0.25-0.5 inches
Narrow and refined, like a well-tailored suit
Shape & Density
Shape: Straight horizontal line with slight upward curl at the ends
Density: Moderate density required - enough for structure but not bushy
Defining Features
- Narrow width throughout
- Extended length beyond face
- Waxed to stiff points
- Slight upward curl at tips
- Clean-shaven areas below and to the sides
Named after the English gentlemen who popularized it during the late Victorian and Edwardian eras, when having a mustache that could double as a coat hanger was considered the height of fashion.